April 20, 2011

15 Stories About Dating Potheads

Stoners are weird. They're like a new species. Their thoughts aren't the same as everyone else's, and neither are their feelings. When it comes to the area of relationships, that weirdness is just magnified.

A non-stoner dating a stoner, is on the front lines of observing a new half-human half-plant hybrid of a person. Okay maybe it's not that dramatic, but it definitely makes for some interesting stories. Here's an article from Nerve.com in which some of their readers talk about what it's like to date a stoner...


"Sometimes, the only kind of love is stoned blind love."

By Nerve.com Readers

I once dated this girl who was a complete stoner — pretty much never sober. One day she came to my house to pick me up and started recounting this amazing experience she'd had on the drive over. Apparently, an angel had formed in the clouds and had spoken to her. She then told me, at length, about the "new" ideas she was having concerning marijuana and spirituality. She said she'd realized that the way to communicate with the Holy Trinity was through getting stoned, and then outlined a complicated method of accessing God through prayerful toking. The funny thing was, she was acting like she was privy to these amazing ideas no one had ever had before, and was getting all excited about sharing her religious message with a spiritually deprived world. I was like, "Yeah, that already exists. It's called Rastafarianism. — Kelly 



The last girl I was in love with was a pothead. We both got really high and went to the opera for my birthday, which seemed like a great idea — until it wasn't. Suddenly you're totally lost, at the Met. It's snowing onstage and you don't know why everyone is singing in tongues, and all these fancily dressed people are glaring at you. It was the second worst birthday of my life. The sex was still great, though. — Dan 




I once dated someone who would smoke a couple nights a week. When she smoked, she'd either be next to normal or high out of her head. I got in the habit of texting "Are you a solid or a liquid?" before I headed over, just to know what I was expecting. When she texted back a weird joke ("I'm a quark! I'm strawberry soymilk"), I'd know she was really baked. — Kevin

A blind date once asked me to meet him near his office. When I arrived, he said he had to go home to walk his dog — an odd start to the date, but why not? We went on a long walk with the dog, and afterwards, somehow he convinced me to enter his apartment. As soon as the door shut, he asked if I minded if he got high. Not my favorite first-date activity, but I said I didn’t mind. And I wouldn’t have, except he hugely overdid it, and curled up on his bed whimpering "I'm so high, I'm so high," while I watched Mean Girls in his living room with his dog. He still calls me sometimes. — Lina


...Read More Stories, and the Whole Article Here at Nerve.com





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